Bank Issues Humorous Quarterly Earnings Statement

Think all banks are boring? First Guaranty Bank which operates primarily in Lousiana and Texas, opened its most recent quarterly earnings with a letter from its president Alton B. Lewis.

“Resilient: Springing back, rebounding,” Lewis begins in his address to shareholders, citing Random House Webster’s Unabridged Dictionary Second Edition. “Returning to the original form for position after being bent, compressed or stretched. Recovering readily from illness, depression, adversity, or the like; buoyant. Another good word is strong. An even better word is tough. These are words that describe what First Guaranty has been during a six month period in which we have survived wound after wound, not of our own causing as we continue to deliver to our shareholders, customers, and our staff members extraordinary results.”

It then goes on to say that there’s been “enough crying over spilt milk” and that “basically, we have and will continue to make a lot of money for our shareholders.”

Lewis appears to have at least delivered. “We have significantly increased our loan interest income to offset the increased cost of deposits which are set by the Federal Reserve,” he said. “For the quarter, we made over $2,000,000 for our shareholders even after the FDIC assessment.”